The Man Who Has No Love (Soulless Book 3) Read online

  “Perfect,” Margo said. “We have the same good taste.”

  Tess left to retrieve the drinks.

  I looked at her ass as she walked away, which was nice and perky, but Deacon was pretty happy with mine so she didn’t stand a chance.

  “You two come here a lot?” Margo asked before she drank from her glass.

  “We came here a few months ago,” Deacon said. “I had this…work thing…and I wanted to take Cleo out as a thank you.”

  “Aww,” she said. “That’s sweet, Deacon.”

  She had no idea how sweet this man could be.

  “But I brought her here with me tonight for another reason,” Deacon said.

  “Oh?” Margo asked, her eyes flicking back and forth between us. “Well, don’t keep me in suspense…”

  Deacon held her gaze as he took a pause. “We’ve been seeing each other for a while…and it’s pretty serious.”

  I liked hearing him describe our relationship that way, like it wasn’t a short-term fling that was delicate and vulnerable. It was strong, invincible.

  Her mouth dropped open. “Oh my god…”

  I smiled but felt my cheeks turn bright red, and I hadn’t even gotten a glass of wine yet.

  “Oh, that’s so wonderful.” Her hands came together against her chest, and she practically swooned. “I thought I saw something between you two…” She tapped her finger against one side of her nose. “A mother always knows.”

  Deacon was a little tense with her like he was with everyone else. When it was just the two of us behind closed doors, he was practically transparent. He wore his thoughts on his face, spoke his mind, and shared a few smiles. But even with his own family, he was a little uneasy.

  It was a great compliment.

  “I’m so happy for you, dear.” She reached across the table and gave his hand a squeeze.

  “Thank you, Mom.” He squeezed hers back, and just to make a point, he looked at me like he was saying, “I told you so.”

  “After all that stuff with Valerie, I was worried you would give up. Thankfully, you found a very lovely girl.” She looked at me and smiled.

  “Thanks, Margo,” I said quietly.

  “So, how long has this been going on?” she asked.

  Deacon was quiet as he considered the question. “Since it became romantic…six weeks. But since everything really started…six months.”

  Margo’s eyes softened. “You were friends first. Those make for the best relationships.”

  Tess returned with the wine and the appetizer. “Have you guys decided?”

  “Oh, we haven’t even had a chance to look at the menu,” Margo said. “My son was just telling me that he and this lovely woman beside him are an item.” She smiled at both of us, oblivious to Tess’s bitchy reaction.

  Her eyes narrowed on my face, like she thought I was too plain for a man like him.

  Maybe my looks were plain compared to hers, but my heart certainly wasn’t. And that’s what Deacon cared about.

  “I’ll give you a few minutes.” Her attitude was no longer warm. Now, she was cold as an icicle. She turned around and walked off.

  I was going to get something gross in my food, but it was still worth it.

  Deacon moved his hand to my thigh under the table. “I think I’m going to get the steak again.”

  “Good choice. Then I’m going to get the same too.” I set my menu on top of his.

  Margo looked over the menu as she rubbed her lips tightly together. “Hmm…I should get the salad, but we’re celebrating, so I’ll get the lobster.”

  “I’m buying, so get whatever you want,” Deacon said.

  “Ooh, my son is quite the gentleman.” She put down her menu. “He’s good to you, Cleo?”

  I almost laughed. “He’s the best man I’ve ever met,” I blurted, speaking from the heart.

  She smiled. “He is, isn’t he?”

  Tess returned, still annoyed. “What can I get you?”

  Deacon ordered for everyone at the table. “Could you also bring more bread as well? My girl likes it.”

  My girl. Aww.

  “Yeah, whatever.” She left the table.

  Margo picked up on the hostility and watched Tess walk away. “Looks like you broke another heart.”

  Deacon ignored what she said.

  “She was our waitress last time,” I explained. “She gave her number to Deacon, but he wasn’t interested.”

  “Ooh.” She chuckled. “Well, she’ll get over it.”

  After she spat in my food.

  “You’re much prettier than she is anyway.” She grabbed her glass and took a drink.

  I wasn’t, but I appreciated the way she made me feel welcome, that I was good enough for Deacon. “Thank you.”

  Once the meal was finished, Margo eyed the dessert menu. “I’m not sure why Deacon hates sweets so much, because he didn’t get that from his father or me.” She was in a teal blouse and white jeans, her hair curled. She was always dressed in a classy way, and her features showed that she was a gorgeous woman in her heyday. Wasn’t surprising considering Deacon’s phenomenal looks. “Should I get the sundae?”

  “I got that last time,” I said. “It was delicious.”

  “Then that’s settled.” She set down the menu. “When Ms. Hissy Fit returns, we’ll get two of them.”

  I liked that she was on my side, like she was my mother or aunt or something.

  Deacon didn’t say anything bad about Tess, not participating in the conversation at all.

  “So, what else is new?” Margo asked. “When is Derek returning for a visit?”

  Tess came to the table with the tab, giving the impression she was in a hurry to get us out of there.

  Deacon didn’t open it, as if he was afraid to look inside. “We’re going to order dessert.”

  “Sure.” Her hands came together, but she looked irritated. “What?”

  Margo shook her head. “It’s not very ladylike to take that tone.”

  “Mom.” Deacon silenced her before it got out of hand. “Two sundaes. And bring the tab with them.” He handed the current one back to her.

  She snatched it out of his hand and walked away.

  “Wow, what a sore loser,” Margo said with a laugh.

  Deacon wore an irritated expression, like he wished this problem would just go away.

  “So, what were you saying?” Margo asked.

  Deacon was quiet, as if he needed a few seconds to switch topics. “Actually, Derek will be here soon—”

  “Oh, that’s wonderful,” she said. “I love my grandson, and not just because he’s the best grandson in the world. It’s like having Deacon as a child again, so much alike.”

  I smiled, having noticed the same thing.

  Deacon didn’t appear moved. “He and Valerie are moving here…permanently.”

  “Really?” She pressed her hand to her chest and looked at me, like she needed me to verify this.

  I nodded.

  “Oh my god, that’s spectacular,” Margo said. “I can see my little boy whenever I want?”

  “Yes,” Deacon said. “For the most part.”

  “I’m not thrilled about Valerie, but I’ll take it.” She clapped her hands together in excitement. “Wow, we’ll all be out here now, in the greatest city on earth. That means Derek will be attending school here in just a few weeks?”

  “Yes,” Deacon answered. “Cleo got him into the best school in the state.”

  “Great,” she said. “That’s really wonderful. And having his father close by to help him learn and grow… What a blessing.”

  Deacon nodded slightly.

  “I’m glad Valerie did the right thing,” she said. “Makes me hate her a little less.”

  Deacon didn’t correct her assumption.

  “Where is she moving?” Margo asked. “Manhattan? Brooklyn?”

  “In my building, actually.” Deacon couldn’t hide his irritation when he shared that piece of information.
Until he moved, he would have to deal with her. He would see her in the elevator, sometimes in the lobby, and knowing her, she would show up unannounced on his doorstep for midnight drop-ins.

  “What?” Margo blurted. “That can’t be right, because when I wanted to live there, the answer was no.”

  “A unit just opened up,” I said.

  “And the waitlist?” she asked.

  I shrugged. “We were able to work something out.”

  She glared at Deacon before she smiled. “I’m kidding, baby. I really like my apartment, and Lily is wonderful. I never have to worry about anything. Just take my private car out shopping. It’s quite the life. But Valerie living in the same building? I think we need some boundaries.”

  “It was conditional,” I said for Deacon. “She wouldn’t move unless we got her a unit in the building.”

  “Ohh…” She grabbed her glass and took a drink. “So, this wasn’t about Derek at all?”

  Deacon shook his head.

  “Then she’s still a bitch,” Margo said. “A big bitch.”

  “Mom.” Even though Deacon hated her more than anyone, he still defended her because she was the mother of his son.

  “Oh, come on,” Margo said. “You know it’s true.”

  Tess brought the desserts and practically threw them down on the table before she walked away.

  Margo watched her go, and then she turned to me. “Maybe not as much of a bitch as that one…”

  Deacon drove me back to my apartment. When the driver dropped us off, he told him, “I’ll walk home.” He gave him a tip and then escorted me inside.

  I set my purse on the table in the entryway then slipped off my heels because they killed my feet. They were gorgeous and worth an entire paycheck, so I’d suffer through them every day just to get compliments. And they made my ass look amazing.

  Deacon stood there, his hands in the pockets of his slacks.

  I turned to him, knowing he had something to say judging by his energy.

  He stared at me for a while, standing straight, his body strong and sexy. Whether he was angry, happy, or nothing at all, he was so sexy all the time. I wasn’t sure how anyone could work with him and not be distracted all the time. “I told you she’d like you.”

  “Yes, it went better than I thought it would.”

  “Your expectation was unfounded in the first place.” He sat on the couch and slipped off his dress shoes and socks.

  I crossed my arms over my chest. “Are you actually upset with me about it?”

  With his arms on his thighs and his head bowed, he took a pause. “I just want you to see you the way I see you.” He got to his feet. “That’s all.”

  “Well, if I saw myself the way you see me, I’d never leave the bedroom.”

  A slow smile crept onto his features. “I’d love to see that.”

  I stepped closer to his body and rose on my tiptoes to give him a gentle kiss on the lips. “Alright, I apologize for being dramatic.”

  His hand cupped the back of my head. “I want something better than an apology.”

  With my eyes on his, I undid every button of his collared shirt, getting it open until his warm chest was against the backs of my knuckles. I moved to his slacks and loosened them too, pushing them over his narrow hips and tight ass so his cock could come free. “Did you have something specific in mind?”

  “Yes.” He pulled my lips into his and kissed me, giving me soft strokes of his lips, a gentle touch of his tongue, before he pulled away and lowered himself to the couch, his knees planted apart, his slacks around his ankles. With his arms spread across the back of the couch and his dick against his stomach, he looked like the king of my apartment, my building, the whole fucking street. “On your knees.”

  I loved this side of him, the bossy side of him that said exactly what he wanted. It wasn’t in the dickish way it used to be. Or maybe it was the same, but I actually wanted to do what he said now.

  I removed my dress and my bra, so I only stood in my black thong. Then I lowered to my knees on the floor, in between his knees, and scooted close until my tits were next to his balls. My hands started at his knees and slowly moved up his muscular thighs, my nipples hard and my tits firm.

  His eyes were on me the entire time, arousal in his gaze as if he didn’t just view me as the woman he cared about, but the woman he’d pick up in a bar and fuck like a maniac. I was the object of his fantasy, the woman he wanted in his bed every night. I was the thing that popped into his head every time he got hard, and I was the thing that made his dick get hard in the first place. His deep voice filled the silence of my apartment. “Show me how sorry you are.”

  Two

  Deacon

  I was sitting at my desk when my phone rang.

  It was Valerie.

  We’d made a bit of progress, but the underlying resentment would never fade. It would take a long time for that pain to drop from my stomach, not to feel like shit every time I saw her name or her face. Did that kind of rage ever go away? Did you ever really move on after someone made you miserable for so long?

  I answered. “Hey, Valerie.”

  “Hey, Deacon,” she said with a sigh. “So, are we going to talk about this?”

  I’d hoped Cleo could handle it for me. But I was the one who had been married to her…unfortunately. “Yes, Cleo told me you want to move in to my building.”

  “And I haven’t gotten a response.”

  “It’s fine, Valerie.” I tried to focus on the positive side of it, the fact that Derek would be just an elevator ride away, that I would be able to take him to school sometimes, that I could even pick him up on my way home. If he ever needed something, it would be convenient for Cleo to swing by and bring him the notebook he’d left behind. It would be the perfect way for us to be parents to Derek, to see him as much as we wanted. Maybe Valerie and I could even become friends, have dinner sometimes, and Derek could see that we were still a family even if we didn’t live together anymore. But the skeptical side of me told me not to be too optimistic.

  “Fine?” she asked. “That’s all you have to say about it?”

  We were doing this again? “I’d prefer to have my own space, but if that’s what you want, then that’s fine. It would be nice to have Derek such a short distance away.”

  “And it’ll be nice to have a whole staff to take care of me. It’ll be nice not to have to worry about anything.”

  Like she worried about anything now.

  “You have to give me a reason to move all the way over there, and that’s what I want.”

  And Derek didn’t fit into that equation at all? “That’s fine, Valerie.”

  “Stop saying that.”

  “What?”

  “Fine. You always say it, and it’s annoying.”

  Cleo didn’t have a problem with it. “What do you want me to say, Valerie? I said you could live in my building. I’m excited that I’ll get to see our son all the time, that he’ll be going to one of the best schools in the country, that he’ll grow up in the greatest city on earth.”

  “Are you excited that you and I might be able to grow our relationship, being so close together?”

  She was the last thing on my mind. “As friends…yes.” Cleo and I had to continue to sneak around and lie because Valerie would probably throw a fit if she knew. So, I was even more annoyed by her presence. But we had to come clean eventually, and I didn’t care how pissed off it made Valerie. I’d never been more dedicated to a woman in my life. Derek was my first priority, my work had been the second, but Cleo quickly took second place and pushed my research to third…like she was family. How was I supposed to really live my life without being honest to the world about my relationship? I wanted Derek to know what she meant to me because I didn’t want to lie to him.

  Valerie was clearly disappointed by that answer but didn’t voice it. “I’m going to start the moving process, ship out my stuff ahead of time. Then we’ll fly out there.”

&nbs
p; “Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.” I felt a jolt of excitement in my chest when I realized Derek was really coming. There wouldn’t be months in between our visits, only a few weeks of quality time together here and there. I wouldn’t have to observe my son’s life through pictures Valerie sent me. I’d get to watch my little boy grow into a man…a man I’d be deeply proud of.

  “Alright. Bye, Deacon.”

  “Wait.”

  “Hmm?”

  “Can I talk to Derek?” I hadn’t spoken to him about the news.

  “Hold on.” She pulled the phone away and yelled into the distance. “Derek! Your dad wants to talk to you.”

  Derek’s incoherent yell came from somewhere in the background.

  I chuckled.

  A moment later, he came onto the phone. “Dad!”

  I never got tired of hearing him say that, of hearing him say it in that same excited tone. Time would pass quickly, and then he would have a deep voice, saying my name in a different, boring way, the way I addressed my mother, the way I’d addressed my father before he was gone. “Hey, little man.” I wished I could see him, but his voice was enough.

  “Mom told me we’re moving in with you!”

  I chuckled. “That’s not really accurate. You’re moving in to my building.”

  “That’s so cool. I’ll see you all the time?”

  “Yes. You’ll get sick of me.”

  “What?” he asked innocently. “I’ll never get sick of you.”

  My eyes softened.

  “Does that mean we can go to the cabin every weekend?”

  “As much as you want, Derek.”

  “Man, this is so awesome! I can’t believe this is happening.”

  “Yeah, it’s wonderful.”

  “And I’ll see Uncle Tucker all the time and Grandma.”

  “Yep. They’re so excited to see you.”

  “And Cleo! I’ll see her all the time too, right?”

  “Yes.” I hoped he’d see her the most.

  “Okay, I’m going to go pack, Dad. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Whoa.” Valerie’s voice was in the background. “We aren’t leaving for a week, Derek.”