The Doctor Who Has No Ambition (Soulless Book 9) Read online

  She stilled her emotion and dropped her hand. “You never said what happened—”

  “Because I don’t fucking know what happened. I made no errors. His heart just wasn’t strong enough. It was his time. No other surgeon in the world would have had different results.”

  “You don’t know that—”

  “Yes, I fucking do know that.” I stepped closer to her, not wanting to raise my voice, but it was inevitable. The door was wide open and our voices trailed into the hallway, but I didn’t give a damn right now. “Because I’m the best heart surgeon in the fucking world. That was why I agreed to do this surgery, because I knew your father would never get better care anywhere else. I put myself in this difficult situation because it was the right call for your father. You have no idea how much of a burden I carried for you—because I want to give you everything you deserve.”

  She dropped her gaze again.

  “I’m so sorry that you lost him. I loved him like a father, Catherine, so the loss has been devastating for me too. But we need to get through this together, not apart. For you to resent me for what happened is ludicrous.”

  She kept her gaze on the floor, her breathing deep and hard. She didn’t say anything, and it didn’t seem like she was going to.

  I noticed her wedding ring was gone and felt a painful burn in my chest. “We’ll get through this, alright? We’ll go to therapy and work through it. It’ll take some time for things to feel normal again, but we’ll get there.”

  She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. That was her cue to speak. She always did it, even in court. She opened her eyes again and looked at me. “I know it’s not your fault. I know you loved my father. I know you did everything you could. But…I just don’t think I’ll ever feel the same way again.”

  My body went into shock, going still and cold, and I stared at her blankly as she stabbed me a thousand times in a microsecond.

  “It’s always going to be there, and I look at you differently now.”

  Was this really happening? I closed my eyes and opened them again, wanting this to be a nightmare. But it wasn’t. “That’s what therapy is for, Catherine. We can work through this—as husband and wife.”

  She dropped her gaze, silently refuting the suggestion.

  “We just started trying to have a family. How can we go from that to this in only a few months?”

  She kept her eyes down.

  “I know you’re devastated right now. I get it. I’m trying to be understanding. But let me refresh your memory of our situation. We’re married. We’re committed to each other through bad and good, sickness and in health, forever. We put in the work to fight for this relationship and spend our lives together. We’re going to be buried next to each other in the cemetery down the road. That’s what we promised each other.”

  “And you promised me he would live…”

  I inhaled a sharp breath between my clenched teeth. “You made me, Catherine. You forced me to, and I love you so fucking much that I wanted to give you whatever the fuck you wanted. How dare you hold that against me.”

  She turned away and grabbed her bags.

  I lost my temper and snatched them out of her hand and threw them on the ground. “What the fuck, Catherine? Is your love for me so weak to let this break us? It’s bullshit.”

  “It’s not that I don’t love you. But it’s different now. When couples lose a child—”

  “We have not lost a child, Catherine. This is a completely different situation. Every marriage has its problems, and we’ll get through this like everyone else. I’m willing to do whatever you need, put in all the work to keep us together. Because you’re my wife—and I love you so fucking much.”

  She started to cry again. “I’m sorry…”

  “Don’t be sorry. Just work on this with me.”

  She looked down at the bags where I’d dropped them then picked them up again.

  “I can’t believe this.”

  She hooked the straps over her shoulder then moved to the door, not looking back at me, just walking out.

  “Wow…” I turned to watch her leave, unable to control my anger and my pain at her betrayal. I dedicated my life to helping people, and she knew that better than anybody. It was one of the reasons she’d fallen for me in the first place. And now she’d decided to turn her back on me, when I cared about my patients more than any doctor ever did. “I can’t believe that your resentment is stronger than what we have. Take some time to pull your head out of your ass. Maybe I’ll still be around by then.”

  Two weeks passed.

  No texts. No calls. Nothing.

  My phone was always in my hand, always waiting and hoping to see the screen light up with her name.

  But that never happened.

  It was hard to resist reaching out to her, not because I was stubborn, but because I wanted her to come back and apologize to me on her own, to fight for this marriage because our time apart made her realize how much she loved me.

  But that didn’t happen either.

  I didn’t tell my family what was going on. I didn’t want them to hate Catherine if she came back and we worked on our problems. My parents were kind and forgiving, but I knew it would change their opinion of her forever.

  I still wanted to make this marriage work because I loved her.

  I really loved her.

  Home alone, I turned weak and texted her. I miss you.

  The dots didn’t show up. A response didn’t come through.

  Baby, come home. Please.

  The next day I was in my office, my phone still quiet because I hadn’t gotten a response from her. We hadn’t spoken once since she’d walked out with her bags in hand. Were her nights just as sleepless as mine?

  My assistant opened the door. “Dr. Hamilton, there’s a lawyer here to see you. Says he needs to give you something.”

  My heart dropped into my stomach because I knew exactly what it was. I was being served.

  I’d been served for medical malpractice, but it was always frivolous, and just to be an ass, I countersued to protect my reputation—and always won. I hoped that was what this was now, another stupid lawsuit because someone knew how deep my pockets were.

  I left my desk and walked into the lobby, eager to get that paperwork in my hands to make sure Catherine’s name was nowhere on it—that she wasn’t the one filing for divorce.

  The suit looked at me. “Are you Dr.—”

  I snatched the manila envelope out of his hand and ripped it open to get the paperwork inside.

  I almost fell to my knees the way Catherine had when she’d learned of her father’s passing. My hands were always steady, but now they shook with unexpected tremors, the paperwork shaking in front of my eyes.

  Because my wife had asked for a divorce.

  Derek opened the door in just his sweatpants, probably watching TV on the couch while his kids were asleep in their bedrooms. He took one look at me and knew my life had just turned to shit. “What is it?”

  “What is it?” I held up the envelope before I shoved it in his face. “You lied to me. That’s what’s fucking wrong.” I pushed past him and stepped into his penthouse when I hadn’t been invited. I’d spent the day blowing up Catherine’s phone and then marching to her mother’s place because I knew that was where she was staying. They wouldn’t open the door. They wouldn’t even give me that courtesy. They treated me like a fucking monster, when all I’d tried to do was save Allen’s life. “You told me I would fall in love with the right woman, and we should spend the rest of our lives together. Well, look at me now.” I turned around and faced him. “My wife left me, and she’s taking half of everything I fucking worked for.”

  Derek pulled out the papers and examined them, his eyebrows furrowed, his look slightly angry.

  Emerson came down the hallway and joined us, probably because she’d heard me yelling. “Is everything okay?”

  “Is everything okay?” I asked incredulously as I tu
rned to look at her, seeing her in her loungewear too, her hair in a bun. “Does it sound like everything is okay? My wife left me, without a word, like I’m some kind of asshole.”

  Emerson flinched at my anger because she’d never seen me like this before. She inched toward Derek, keeping a few feet of distance between us.

  Derek looked up from the papers. “Dex—”

  “I fucking told you this would happen. And if you think it’s not going to happen to you too, then you’re fucking stupid. Watch, Emerson is gonna walk out on you just the way Catherine did to me, and you’ll see.”

  Emerson stood beside her husband and continued to stare at me.

  Derek lowered his gaze and didn’t say anything.

  I was furious at the world, at everyone, even people who didn’t deserve it. “I tried to save her father’s life…and now she doesn’t love me anymore. One day, you’ll do something, and then Emerson will pack her shit and take your wallet too—”

  “Enough.” Derek set the papers on the table beside him. “Don’t talk to my wife like that—”

  “It’s fine.” Instead of being angry, Emerson looked at me like she was just as heartbroken, like she could really feel my pain, like it had happened to her too. She slowly stepped toward me and opened her arms so she could embrace me.

  I breathed hard as she came closer, closed my eyes when I felt her arms around me.

  She squeezed me tightly with her cheek pressed to my chest. “I’m so sorry, Dex.” She rubbed my back and embraced me like she was biological family.

  It took me a moment to hug her back, to raise my arms and wrap them around her, to squeeze her hard and let my true emotions break through the dam that held them back. “I did everything for her… I loved her. I still do. I’ll always love her.”

  “I know…” She continued to rub my back.

  Derek came closer and stood beside us, his hand moving to my back too. “I’m sorry, man.”

  Emerson pulled away to look at me, her eyes wet. “Are you sure you can’t work it out?”

  I shook my head. “I suggested therapy. She said no. I said I wanted to fight for our relationship. She still said no. Just a few months ago, we were trying to get pregnant, and now…she says she doesn’t look at me the same anymore. She’s been staying at her mom’s for a couple weeks, but I thought she would come back after she had some space. I texted her yesterday and told her I missed her, that I wanted her to come home, and she never replied. Then the next day, she sends her lawyer to serve me.” I was floored by her cruelty, the way she’d cut me out of her life so easily, that she could break my heart and continue to turn her cheek. I remembered our wedding like it was yesterday, remembered every day of our marriage like it was a series of flashbacks. She was the love of my life, we were happy, everything was perfect. Until it wasn’t. “If I’d never taken her father as a patient, we would still be happy right now. But I killed him…and lost my wife.”

  Sicily

  One Year Later

  The office was spacious, with a white desk, a vase full of colorful flowers, and the trim along the walls painted gray to match the accents in different places. It was very chic. Behind the desk sat Cleo, the Director of Concierge Services at the Tribeca building.

  Basically, the woman who had my life in her hands.

  I really wanted this job.

  My last office closed down, and without my boyfriend’s money, I’d be drowning right now. So, I needed employment fast. Plus, I really wanted this particular job. The salary was almost double what I used to make, came with benefits, and catering to high-end clients sounded like plain fun.

  Cleo looked up from her paperwork and regarded me with a smile, possessing a warmth that made her feel like a friend rather than a potential boss. Instead of a grilling like all the other interviews I’d been on, it felt more like a conversation in a coffee shop. “Did your last office go out of business?”

  “No. Dr. Richmond retired.”

  “It was a medical office?” she asked.

  “Yeah. A pediatrician’s office, so I got to see cute kids all the time. My ovaries would scream every single day.”

  Cleo chuckled. “I can imagine. If I weren’t too old, I would just keep having kids.”

  “How many do you have?”

  “Three,” she said with a smile. “But they’re all adults now.”

  It was hard to distinguish her age based on her features because she was really petite, had great skin, hair that looked better than mine, and didn’t wear glasses. But maybe in her fifties? “Grandchildren?”

  “Oh, I have some of those.” She grinned wider. “I’ve got three. Two boys and a girl.”

  “That’s better, if you ask me. You spoil them, then give them back.”

  She chuckled. “And that’s exactly what I do.” She turned back to the paperwork. “So, why do you think you’d be a good fit for our concierge team? The hours aren’t always steady, privacy is critical, and you have to be ready for requests you’ve never imagined before.”

  “The hours don’t bother me. After working the same hours every single day in an office, it’ll be nice to have a change. Doing parties and events sounds like fun. I’m pretty outgoing. Privacy isn’t a problem because I don’t gossip anyway. And I’m up for any challenge. I’m a big people person, so working in a collaborative hospitality environment sounds enjoyable. I’m pretty easy to get along with.”

  “Great.” She made some notes before she turned back to me. “When can you start?”

  My smile fell when I heard what she’d said. “Wait, what?”

  She smiled. “Yes, you got the job.”

  “No…”

  She chuckled. “I think you’ll be a good fit here.”

  “Really? I’ve never been hired on the spot before.”

  “Well, I have a knack for these sorts of things. I can read people pretty well.”

  I made a couple air punches. “Yes. Yes. Yes. I really wanted this job. And to top it off, I’m going to dinner with my man tonight, and I’m pretty sure he’s going to propose. So, I got my dream job and my dream man.”

  “Aw, that’s great.” She set down the papers now that the interview was over and brought her hands together on the desk, her fingers interlocked. She was naturally poised and elegant, but she had a relaxed aura to her as well. “I remember when my husband proposed to me. The greatest day of my life.”

  “Did you know?”

  She shook her head. “I didn’t. How do you know?”

  “He’s been acting differently. A little quiet, a little mysterious. I think he’s nervous. He just flew in this morning and wants to take me somewhere nice for dinner.”

  “He travels for work?”

  “He’s a pilot.” I waggled my eyebrows.

  “Ooh, must be a smart guy.”

  “Yeah, I have a thing for smart guys.”

  “Well, I’m excited to see your ring on Monday.”

  “And I’m excited to show it off.” I got to my feet to shake her hand. “And thank you so much for the opportunity. I’m so excited to be working here. It’s kind of a dream job.”

  She came around the desk, and instead of taking my hand, she hugged me.

  I hugged her back, feeling like I was hugging a mother rather than a boss.

  “It’s the best job in the world, if you ask me.” She pulled away and squeezed my arms before she let go. “See you soon.”

  Vince sat across from me at the table, the two of us drinking a bottle of wine while we ate our appetizers. A white candle glowed on the table between us, and other couples in the restaurant talked quietly and enjoyed each other’s company. He was in a black blazer with a gray shirt underneath, and his smile lifted as he stared at me. “What are you so happy about?”

  Well, I’m about to get engaged. “I got that job.”

  “You did?” His smile widened. “That’s great, baby.”

  “Looks like I don’t need to mooch off you anymore.”

  “
Like I mind you being in my debt.” He gave a charismatic wink.

  Only a guy like him could pull off a move like that. I took a sip of my wine to cover the flutter in my heart. I’d been looking for the right man for a very long time, and now I had a sexy pilot who was everything I wanted. I’d seen him in his pilot’s uniform at the airport, pulling his luggage behind him with the flight crew in tow. They stopped at the gate and waited to be let on, and since I wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity, I gave him my number. He called a few days later, and the rest is history.

  It’d only been six months, but I didn’t need any more time to know this was the man I wanted to spend my life with.

  His phone must have kept vibrating in his pocket because he dropped his smile and pulled it out to check the screen. His look of disappointment was undeniable.

  “Work?”

  “Yeah, let me take this.” He walked toward the lobby before he answered.

  I continued to drink my wine and enjoy the stuffed mushrooms. He was scheduled to be off this weekend, so I hoped he wasn’t being called to cover for another pilot. We were supposed to spend the weekend at his apartment, tangled up in the sheets, my ring sitting on his nightstand while I showered.

  He came back a few minutes later, his face pale.

  “Everything alright?”

  “Yeah.” He grabbed his wine, took a big drink, and then he faced me once more, still looking visibly uncomfortable. “Baby, there’s something I need to talk to you about. I know it’s a lot to take in, but…we’ll figure it out.”

  Shit, he wasn’t proposing. “Oh my god, are you sick?” I set my glass down so hard, a bit of wine sloshed onto the white tablecloth. My hand moved over my heart, and my head immediately started to spin as I pictured a life without this man.

  “No, nothing like that.” He leaned over the table with his arms outstretched. He dropped his gaze for a while, thinking of the words he could use to convey his troubles. “Look, I want to marry you. I’m sure you know that.”