The Man Who Has No Sight (Soulless Book 4) Read online

  Cleo was quiet, unsure what to say.

  “This woman barely knows you, and she’s living with you?” Valerie continued. “Isn’t it obvious that she’s a gold digger? She’s the help that assists everyone in the building, and you think—”

  “Valerie.” I did not want to have this hysterical conversation in front of my family—and Derek. I kept my voice calm so she would match me. “Cleo lost her job and her apartment. She needed a place to stay until she got back on her feet. I offered to let her stay with me in the meantime.” I left out the part where it was entirely Valerie’s goddamn fault it happened in the first place.

  Valerie grew quiet, but her chest rose and fell deeply, like she was confining her anger to her lungs.

  My mom wore her expressions like words on a page—and she looked pissed.

  Tucker just looked awkward, staring at the floor like he had no idea what else to do.

  Cleo was still, like she hoped she could just fade into the background.

  Derek adopted his usual attitude when we fought, trying to be as small as possible until it stopped.

  Mom set down her drink. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t speak to my son that way.”

  Oh fuck. “Mom—”

  She got to her feet and pointed at Valerie. “You don’t own my son. He’s free to do whatever he wishes, move in with anyone he wants, and it’s really none of your business. Cleo is absolutely wonderful, and he could marry her tomorrow and we would all be thrilled. Who are you to talk down about her position when you didn’t have a penny to your name before my son came along and fell into your trap? All the nice things you have are from my son’s hard work. You did nothing to earn it—except lie on your back.”

  Jesus Christ. “Mom.” I got to my feet and moved in front of her. “Enough, alright?”

  Tucker covered his mouth with his hands, like he was trying to cover his smile.

  Valerie got to her feet. “Derek, let’s go.”

  He stayed on the couch next to Cleo. “I don’t wanna…”

  She snatched him by the wrist and pulled him off the couch.

  I was on her so fucking fast. “Don’t. Do. That. Again.” I put myself between her and Derek, not allowing her to drag him any farther across the couch and the floor like some kind of rag doll. She didn’t strike him or slap him, but her behavior was inappropriate. I wouldn’t tolerate it.

  She knew I didn’t get angry like this often, so she didn’t challenge me.

  “Derek stays here for the weekend,” my mother said. “You can go, Valerie.”

  “Don’t tell me what I can do with my son, bitch,” Valerie screeched. “I can make sure your son never sees him again. That goes for you too.”

  “Really?” Cleo asked, getting to her feet, her phone in her hand. “Because I just recorded the entire outburst on my phone…and you look a little unstable.” She held it up and replayed it, getting the shot of Valerie dragging her son across the floor, of me stepping in and defending him.

  Valerie had never looked so pissed. She clearly didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to handle the loss of power she’d just experienced. All her leverage was gone with the snap of a finger. She could tell the judge about my drinking problem, but there was no video footage, and this moment made Valerie look a million times worse than I ever would.

  She moved to the door and walked out.

  Mom went after her into the hallway. “That’s what I thought, bitch.” She stormed back into my condo and slammed the door.

  Tucker got to his feet and burst into hysterical laughter. “Holy fucking shit…that was awesome.”

  I didn’t even care about the cussing at this point. There was so much of it.

  “Mom…you’re a badass.” Tucker gave her shoulder a squeeze.

  “Thank you, honey,” Mom said proudly. “Those mama bear instincts never go away.”

  Cleo was the only one who understood I wouldn’t be relieved, that I didn’t want this to happen, especially in front of Derek. She moved to me, giving me a sad look as she rubbed my arm. “I’m so sorry.”

  “Why?” Tucker asked. “You got concrete evidence that she’s a bitch—”

  “Okay, enough with the cussing,” I snapped. “Derek is still here.”

  Derek shrugged. “She is a bitch—”

  “Don’t talk about your mother like that. Go to your room.” I pointed down the hallway. “Now.”

  Derek didn’t provoke my anger and did what I said.

  Tucker looked at me quizzically. “We should be celebrating right now. She can never pick up her shit and move away from you. She can never take Derek away from you again. This is awesome. Do you understand how free you are right now?”

  Yes, it was a blessing. “It is a relief. But I do want Valerie and me to get along—for Derek’s sake. I don’t want him to have two parents who can’t be in the same room together. And I don’t want Derek to think it’s acceptable to call a woman, especially his mother, a bitch.”

  “Even if she is a bit—”

  “Yes, Tucker,” I interrupted. “That’s not the kind of man I want my boy to grow up to be.” I moved my hands to my hips and sighed, unable to believe all of that just happened.

  “But you should also show him to stand up for himself,” Mom said. “Not to accept less than what you deserve, to call people out on their flaws instead of tolerating it. Don’t be so hard on yourself, Deacon. Life isn’t some controlled experiment in the lab. You’ve done everything you possibly can for that kid, but you can’t hide the fact that his mother is a terrible person. That’s not your fault.”

  “Yeah,” Tucker said in agreement.

  “And he should see what happens when someone crosses his grandmother,” Mom retorted. “Talking to my son that way, calling me a bitch… I’m an advocate for civility, but there’s no tolerating that horrendous woman. Maybe you need to give up on this dream of having the three of you be in the same room together. Maybe it’s best for Derek to have two separate parents and separate lives, because she’s a toxic person. Sometimes, it’s appropriate to cut out that toxic person in your life.”

  “You deserve more,” Tucker said. “You stayed in a marriage you didn’t want to be in. You put up with her even when she’s a nightmare. You’ve tried everything, man. Now that you’ve gotten what you need, maybe it’s time to give up.”

  I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at my family, the people who just wanted me to be happy. Then I turned to Cleo, the person who had taken that video and finally given me my freedom. “What do you think?”

  She seemed caught off guard by the question. “I…I don’t think what I think matters.”

  “It matters to me.”

  She brought her hands together in front of her stomach, adopting her professional posture. “I’m not going to tell you what to do. But you’ve bent over backward for this woman, made every sacrifice you could to do the right thing—and the result is always the same. Maybe it is time to move on.”

  I turned back to my family. “I’m sorry about everything that happened today. I just wanted us to have a nice holiday.”

  Mom smiled and patted my cheek. “It was nice, honey.”

  “Yeah,” Tucker said. “You just got your life back. It’s the best holiday we’ve ever had.”

  We finished all the dishes, packed all the leftovers, and cleaned up the kitchen.

  Cleo took another slice of pie and leaned against the counter as she ate it, like she was exhausted from the long day and had worked up another appetite.

  I glanced to the living room where Derek was sitting on the floor watching TV. He had his toys around him.

  She kept eating. “I think this is the best pie I’ve ever had…” She didn’t talk about the incident with Valerie even after my family left, like she didn’t want the conversation to happen in front of Derek.

  “I’m gonna put him to bed…have a little talk with him.”

  Her eyes shifted to me, like she knew what the su
bject of that discussion would be. “I’m pretty tired, so I’m probably going to go to bed too.” She finished the last bite and left the dirty dish in the sink, like she was so tired she couldn’t even wash one more dish.

  “I want you to sleep with me tonight.”

  She stilled beside me, as if she expected to sleep alone like usual. “Even with Derek here?”

  “We’ve done it before. I’m sure Valerie does it with Jake.”

  “Alright…” She moved into me and hugged me before she walked away and headed down the hallway to my bedroom.

  I moved to the living room. “Derek, it’s time for bed.”

  He usually argued to stay up a little later, but after the shitshow today, he knew I wasn’t in the mood for a negotiation. He was already in his pajamas and had already brushed his teeth, so he picked up toys and carried them to his room.

  I turned off the TV and most of the lights before I followed him.

  He left his toys on the dresser before crawling into bed.

  I turned on the lamp on his nightstand and sat on the edge of his bed.

  He lay on his side toward me, the covers to his shoulder. Instead of asking me questions or talking to me about his day, he just lay there, like he knew something was wrong…and it wouldn’t be right for a long time.

  “I’m sorry about what happened today.” There was nothing I wanted more than for Valerie and me to get along, not for my sake, but for his. Maybe it was easier for me to deal with Valerie because I was pragmatic and logical about the situation, keeping one goal in mind. But she was the opposite. She was emotional, unpredictable, spontaneous…or maybe that was giving her too much credit.

  “Why do you and Mom hate each other?”

  That was the last thing I wanted him to think. “We don’t, Derek.”

  “You’ve never gotten along, even when you lived together.”

  “Because your mother and I aren’t right for each other. We don’t love each other the way two people should when they’re married. We don’t hate each other either. It’s just…complicated. It doesn’t change the way we feel about you, though.”

  “You and Cleo love each other.”

  I nodded. “We do. That’s how a relationship should be. That’s what you should look for when you’re older.”

  “Why can’t you and Mom have that?”

  I would never be able to explain this to a five-year-old, regardless of how advanced he was. “Because we don’t love each other. We’ve tried being friends, but it’s too difficult for us. So, from now on, I think you’ll spend time with Mom on your own…and then me on your own.”

  “Okay…”

  “I know it’s weird, not to see us together, but I think that’s the best thing for all of us.”

  “Why don’t I just stay with you and not see her?”

  I hated Valerie, but I really didn’t want my son to hate her. But as he got older, he might make that conclusion on his own, based on his own observations. I couldn’t protect Valerie from that. Right now, he was a sweet and innocent boy who didn’t analyze her behaviors and what they meant. But in a few more years…he would. Maybe it was inevitable. Derek was just like me; I didn’t get along with her, so he probably wouldn’t either. “Because she’s still your mother.”

  “But why do I have to stay with her most of the time?”

  If I could have full custody, I would take him in a heartbeat. “That’s just how it is, Derek.” I might be able to take her to court and win at this point, but I really didn’t want to do that to Valerie or Derek. I’d rather try to have a schedule or switch off, try to do it the easy way before resorting to the hard way. “Your mother loves you. And you love her. Remember, I’m close by. You can always get to me if you need me.”

  He nodded. “I’m sorry Mom makes you so sad…”

  My hand went to his waist, giving him a gentle squeeze that matched the tug on my heart. “It’s okay, Derek. You and Cleo make me really happy, so it’s okay.” I’d spent so much time trying to be a nontraditional family with Valerie, when in reality, Cleo was already my family. The three of us…were a family.

  “I’m glad she makes you happy, Dad. I like seeing you happy.”

  My hand went to his cheek, looking at him like he was the most precious thing in the world. “You’re the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me, Derek. I don’t care how sad your mother makes me, I don’t care about our problems, because you have always been worth it.” Sometimes my eyes watered when I said these things, because I just couldn’t believe how much I loved this little person beside me, how he made me into a better man, how much I would sacrifice just to make him smile. “I love you, son.” I leaned down and kissed him on the forehead.

  “I love you too, Dad.”

  I sat up and turned off the lamp.

  “Dad?”

  I was about to stand up, but I stayed. “Hmm?”

  “Can we go to the cabin tomorrow?”

  “It’s cold…not a lot to do there when it’s not warm.”

  He shrugged. “We haven’t been in a while.”

  It had been projected to snow, but the weather forecast had changed. Derek had never seen the snow because we didn’t get any in California. Cleo would love to take the trip because she loved that place too. “Sure.”

  He smiled. “Really?”

  “Yeah.” It was the least I could do after the shitty Thanksgiving we’d had. “But you better get to sleep fast. We’re gonna leave early in the morning.”

  “Okay.” He closed his eyes and went still, like he was already asleep.

  I chuckled then kissed him on the forehead again before I left his bedroom and moved to the other side of the condo to mine. I closed the bedroom door behind me, my room dark, the bedding hugging her curves under the sheets. She was still, like she was already asleep.

  I moved to my side of the bed and stripped off the long-sleeved sweater, the t-shirt underneath, and then my shoes and jeans. It was nice to get the weight off, to remove all my clothes and return to my usual comfort. I dropped my boxers and got into bed beside her.

  She opened her eyes and looked at me, like she was still awake, but partially drifting off. “How’d it go?”

  “I told him his mother and I probably wouldn’t be in the same room anymore. He seemed to understand.”

  Her hand moved under the sheets to my chest, her soft fingertips gliding over my hard body.

  “He understands she makes me unhappy…and he wants me to be happy.”

  “He’s such a sweet boy.”

  “I know he is.” It was a privilege to be his father. “I don’t want him to hate her, but I suspect that might be inevitable someday based on the way she is. Deep down, I know I don’t like anything about her on a human level, and Derek is too young and innocent to feel that way now, but he will when he’s older. I won’t be able to protect her, preserve her reputation. So maybe I need to stop trying.”

  “I think you need to move on and live your life, Deacon. You’ve been trying so hard to be a perfect family, and you just can’t force something that’s not meant to happen. Derek still has good role models, like you as a father, your mother as a woman…”

  “And you.”

  She didn’t agree verbally, but her eyes softened. “He’ll be alright. You’ve done enough. It’s time to let go.”

  “Yeah…I think so too.”

  “And that video is vicious. She has nothing over your head anymore.”

  The chains were off my wrists and ankles. I didn’t have to entertain her manipulation and her threats. “That was smart thinking.”

  “I just seized the opportunity.”

  I was pissed Valerie had grabbed Derek like that, and sometimes I worried about how she treated him, but since Derek was so well behaved, I doubted there was any reason to use force. I never had to. He might be the victim of neglect, which was a form of abuse, but he was so intelligent that he could entertain himself. And he always had me, just a short elevator ride aw
ay. “He wants to go to the cabin tomorrow.”

  She smiled. “Of course he does. What did you say?”

  “Yes.”

  “Yay. I’m so glad our office is closed for the holiday.” She scooted closer to me, tucking her leg between mine.

  “He’s never seen the snow.”

  “Aww. What about you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Do you have any snow gear for him?”

  “No, actually.”

  “I’ll take care of it in the morning.”

  “On Black Friday?” I asked in surprise.

  “Yeah. But I know people. Don’t worry about it.” She scooted closer to me, her lips resting against my neck. Her hand moved down my chest to my hip, and she took a breath when she realized I was naked.

  It’d been a long time since we’d been together, and when I came to bed, I already knew what I wanted. I’d been in a bad mood all week, so I’d had no desire, but not having her had probably made my mood worse. It was like getting sucked into a black hole. Now that the weight was off my shoulders, I felt liberated.

  I rolled her to her back, my hand sliding over her stomach to her hip so I could grab the lace of her panties. I pulled them down as I looked into her eyes, seeing the way her lips parted instantly, like she was ready for this with the simple press of a proverbial button.

  She was in one of my shirts, so she pulled it to her stomach then arched her back to get it off all the way.

  I moved on top of her, our bodies coming close together, the tops of my thighs pressed against her inner ones. My weight pressed her into the mattress, and I positioned myself on top of her, folding her underneath me, getting her in the exact position I wanted to take her.

  Then I slid inside her…and she was so smooth.

  She moaned quietly, her hands immediately anchoring into my back, her nails digging into my flesh.

  She felt so fucking good. I was a man who succumbed to the perfection of a woman, feeling like a king wrapped around in her warm tightness. But it felt even better because it was her…and it was me. When we’d made love in the kitchen, I’d lasted less than five seconds because it’d been the longest dry spell of my adult life. Now, it’d only been a week…and the same thing had happened again.